Psychic thwarts evil

It was slow at the Home Depot. The cashier, a lady about 70 or so with yellow-shaded glasses and an iron-grey perm, coughed and apologized.  She wasn’t contagious, she said, and then detailed the meds she’d been given to cure her bout with a superbug. She added, “To top all THAT off, my ex-husband was a coma for four days.”

She finished ringing up the curtain rods and drapes.

I looked as sympathetic as I could.

“The minute my son came into his room, he woke up and said hello.”

“Wow.”

“Yes. But you see, I’d been sending him messages. I said — telepathically, y’know — ‘you have to get up, you can’t just lie around like that. You’re gonna die if you do. So get up!’ And he did, just as soon as my son came in. I sent those messages to him all across the country down to Florida. And he heard.

“It’s always been like that. When my ex was stationed in Jordan, Prince Hussein would cut the phones off every now and then. I didn’t think that my messages, the telepathy, you know, might travel that far. But we had a family emergency, and I couldn’t reach him. So I sent him the messages. Next thing you know, I get a call from London, and he’s saying, ‘Honey, what’s the matter? I knew I had to come home.'”

She looked satisfied, the way a person does when she’s made something fine and is proud of the result.

“We’d never tried it that far, but it worked. All across the globe. We did it all the time in Atlanta. We lived in Marietta, and there was a Krispy Kreme donut shop he’d stop at on the way to work. Another one was across the street, the opposite side. One day he comes back from work with a box of donuts and he said, ‘I don’t know why I got these, but I did,’ and I told him I’d just messaged him mentally. Happened all the time.

“My kids, too. They knew when they were growing up that I’d always know if they were in a bad area. They didn’t always like it. Now I trade messages with my little granddaughter. Taught her how. I’m so glad I did, too.

“It was late at night, and I heard her. She sent me a message, saying her stepfather was in her bedroom. ‘He shouldn’t be here, Granny.’ Well, I called the police right then and met them in front of her house.”

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